With Father’s Day right around the corner, I felt inspired to write a little something about my “better” half. He deserves a lot more recognition for his job within our family than I could express. But I’ll give it my best shot. If you haven’t already picked this up from my other blog posts here,
I am raising two young men that are six years apart. I have two of the most amazing
, wonderful little men I could have ever asked for. And I can’t imagine my life any other way! They truly bring an incredible sense of happiness and wonder to our lives. I love them to the ends of the Earth. They can tear a house down from the floor to the ceiling if you let them, though. So luckily for me, I’ve got a wonderful side-kick to help me out!
I am literally the only girl here. My kids are boys. Our dogs are boys. Even the fish is a boy. I know, because the lady at the pet store told us.
“Is this one a boy fish or a girl fish?” Max asked me. I didn’t get to answer though.
“We only sell male fish here. No females…don’t want you guys making fish babies!” the employee said to him.
Needless to say, I got a LOT of questions about fish reproduction that day. And then, human reproduction. Thank you, pet store lady, THANK YOU. So yes, I am quite literally the only female in the house.
I’ve always been a little bit of a helicopter mom. I think a lot of that comes from being a single parent for the first 1.5 years of my son’s life. I remember yelling at people to not put my baby in the sun for longer than five minutes because babies could get sunburned even in the shade.
Since my oldest son Max was little, my husband has always been really adamant about getting him outdoors and exposing him to different activities. Fishing is a HUGE deal in our family. I didn’t quite understand it though and was a little nervous when my husband tried to have Max go fishing at the tender age of two. I mean, he had only been alive for barely two years of his life! He had only experienced so much and understood the very basic things. He was still a baby!
The hooks scared me, and I shivered at the thought of anything ever happening to my baby. But, the day came for us to take him out to the pond, and I decided to go along. In my head, I was already wrapping him up in bubble wrap, and swatting away fishing poles from his grasp. He just wasn’t ready. How could my husband think he was? We arrived at the fishing spot, and I nervously let my son go down by the water with his dad. I kept my eyes on them both constantly, waiting for the opportunity to make some kind of excuse as to why we should leave.
The First Day
My hubby cast the line, helped Max jig, and they caught a fish! Max’s very first fish! It was then that I saw the light. You know, when your kid sees something or does something they really enjoy, and this smile spreads across their whole face. It’s like someone reached right into their chest, pulled a string, and turned a light on. And the light pours right through them and beams out of their eyes and mouth as they smile with this amazing, pure, innocent JOY. Max’s face did just that as he caught his very first fish. And after that, he was….”hooked”. Haha. I’m so funny. Admit it. Come on! Okay, I’m done. Back to blogging ;).
Only second to Max’s face when he hooked that fish, was my husband’s excited grin! He saves this grin for very special occasions where his heart bursts out of his chest. As I sat there, watching them catch fish after fish after fish – I realized that none of this would have happened if I had kept Max to myself. I would have prevented my husband from falling into his natural parenting role as a father, and my son from benefiting from TWO loving and capable parents.
As a father, my husband reigns supreme. He has such a strong desire to teach our boys self-sustaining skills. He loves to see them learn something he has taught them, especially when it comes to different tricks and skills. Teaching Max to fish was such an achievement for both of them; a way of passing the torch to the next generation. He felt as though he gave him one of the tools he needed to provide for himself and his future family one day.
That is his absolute favorite part of being a dad. I got to witness just how wonderful that experience is for both my husband and our kids when I finally let go a little that first fishing day. It truly made me excited to see what else my husband had in store for the boys.
Helicopter Mom No More
But once I let go, my husband didn’t just stop at fishing. He went on to archery, Lego building, organizing (ha! the boys are a little OCD), and even his love for cars. And every day it seems, they’ve picked something else up from watching and listening to him. Jax is still too little to really repeat what my husband says or start with sports. But I am so excited to watch my husband take Jax under his wing too.
I creep on them sometimes, as I’m supposed to be washing the dishes, or wiping the counters. They will be huddled together on the couch in front of the TV. Jax will be snuggled in between my husband’s chest and arm, and Max will be resting on his other shoulder. My heart just melts right in my chest, and I can’t believe how incredibly lucky we all are to have one another. And while it irks me at times to be sitting for a few hours in front of the screen, I can also realize that it is something else that my children will have to share with my husband…his love for movies.
I am so glad I let go of my “helicopter mom hold” on my boys. Because truth be told, my husband is a pretty great parent too. I might not have realized that if I didn’t give him the chance. He is a great fisherman, a good sport, stubborn when he thinks he’s right, but also humble about his accomplishments and successes. He is a pretty good hunter, and he can name any movie in the world just by hearing one single quote from it. I bet those things will be easily translated to our children.
The one thing that he can’t teach through words that I hope they pick up on, is the fact that he is such a wonderful man too.